Dante Seraphim

Marcus Faust has a blood cousin, Dante Seraphim. In Noristrad all the royal houses (families) are vampires or headed by a vampire, except the monarchy itself. Vampires usually install a human puppet on the throne to keep the humans pacified.

He was originally based off Raziel before he was betrayed by Kain in Soul Reaver. My story was about how Faust manipulated Dante to do things for him, but Faust always at the last moment would jump in and save Dante if he felt he needed it. I wrote this long novel with every intention of publishing it, until I set it aside for a couple of years, then pulled it back out and read it. It was completely awful. It was like a child wrote Soul Reaver fan fiction.

Dante was my vampire that was supposed to not be like the others of his kind. He didn’t care about vampire politics, he was an advocate for humans, often protecting them from other vampires. He’d been raised a count, with lands, but gave the title to his heir, Rene, and wanted to be left alone to live on his ancestral estate: Angelwood. He had taken on a life of a hermit, but even though he acted like he hated to be disturbed, he often appreciated the visits from Faust. He had weaknesses that other vampires didn’t have, such as he lacked telepathy, and to attempt to use it on him it was debilitating, for Dante. He pined after his deceased wife, Chalarty, so no other women interested him. He was virtuous, he protected and defended those he considered family and friends.

In 2012 & 2013 I began to flesh out more of Noristrad and more of the vampire politics, and in fact, more of the convolution between the houses of Faust and Seraphim, and I decided that Dante really needed a new face. At that moment I was putting moons on my all my ikes and came across this image of Aidan Turner from Being Human and decided that Dante Seraphim had found a new face.

I roleplayed off and on with Dante and Faust, I enjoyed god moding too much to let anyone else into the monologue. I just never had the same feel for Dante that I did in 2000, so Faust became my favorite and I found myself writing more for Faust than Dante. I actually pulled Dante from my medieval Noristrad and put him into a more modern setting, I brought Faust with him, but Faust became someone who he sought for information or guidance, and Dante was the main character. It was told from his point of view and from the point as if he was writing his memoirs. I fully intended it to begin him telling about his life and activities as a young vampire and to be interrupted by whatever modern events were happening. I was trying for a ‘case a week’ type story telling, and I wrote 5 cases, they seemed weak. I’ve posted the first case on my writing blog: Dusty Words I also intend to post one of the parts of the medieval monologue with Faust and Dante.

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Intuitive Sucks!

I don’t consider myself an empath. Like psychics I don’t believe they exist, but if they did I would almost consider myself one. An empath, not a psychic, psycho for sure, but not a psychic. However, along with ghosts and aliens, I’m opening minded, and haven’t seen either, so if someone could prove to me they were a psychic or an empath, I would be made to believe.

I’ve always considered myself passionate. I care about things and people and stuff. I also cry very easily. I cry when I’m insulted, I cry when bad things happen to strangers, I cry at commercials, movies, songs and video games. I cried at the end of God of War 3. My husband says, “Why are you crying? He was an asshole!”

I’ve never been able to figure out or read body language well, can’t tell if people are lying or not unless I know the truth before they lie. I’m a trusting soul, and very forgiving. However I’ve always picked up on emotion. Not that I can tell someone is sad or angry, but often I feel it too. Let me give an example:

A girl and I did not get along at work. She has a bad attitude. She was recently talked to by management and told to get a better attitude. She didn’t like me because she said I was calling her racial slur (I wasn’t) just because I knew she didn’t like it. Well suddenly she had a great new attitude. She was friendly, she said please and thank you, she addressed me by name. I even commented to management about her turn around. I hoped that now we might be able to be work friends. One day I came into work and she wouldn’t talk to me. I could just feel it coming off her, and I asked her if she was alright. She just turned away from me. So I let a few minutes pass (I was gathering up courage) and I could already feel the the tears coming. So I told her that if she was upset with me, I was sorry, and that if I do something that upsets her, she has to let me know. (By this time I was crying.) Because if she’s upset then I’m upset. She says she just has a lot on her mind.

Let’s talk about Brett, Brett is my favorite employee at the fast food company I work for. He is so many times wonderful. He’s extremely quiet, and when he does speak, it is usually in hushed tones. He’s like a severe introvert at work, but I asked him if he was as introverted at work as he was with friends and he said no. I make it my goal to tell him things that will make him smile or shake his head in disbelief. When I asked if he would miss me when I quit the fast food job he said yes that there will be 1 less person around who actually works. I took that as a huge compliment. Anyway, Brett gets angry easily. He has a temper, and I’ve seen it, he’s never taken it out on me, but he’s been cruel to some cooler doors, and boxes. So last Sunday he’s angry, I can feel it. However unlike where the girl was upset and I was upset too, I don’t get angry. I feel his anger, but I turn it into avoidance and attempt to try to diffuse his anger.

He was angry several nights ago over the fact he had to close grill and back room. So I offered to go halfsies on grill with him. He cleaned the chicken grill and fryer filters and I’d do the rest. He agreed and it calmed him down. On Sunday he was having to close inside sandwiches and back room, so I went to him again and said I’d help him. (Once again, his being angry was bringing me to tears, but I didn’t cry.) He told me no, he wasn’t going to close the sandwich station the way that management wanted. It wasn’t fair that he was the one who always had to close multiple stations.

Of course after typing this out and trying to explain what it feels like to feel something from another person. It is probably just all inside my head, and I just worry myself to tears, but I so often take it upon myself to make others feel better or to not feel alone or to just let them know that I know how they feel.

Marcus Faust

I figured I would dust off my old characters and introduce them and talk a little about them. In FFRPG you often have a photo to represent what your character looks like. Now I have to admit my own version of Fifty Shades of Gray. Fifty Shades of Gray began as Twilight fan fiction and the author changed the names of the characters. Well I was basically writing Soul Reaver fan fiction and I changed the names of the characters too. So Kain became Marcus Faust, and Raziel became Dante Seraphim. After all these years I’ve kept Kain as the image of Marcus Faust, even taking a popular wallpaper and my poor photoshop skills to make a rather nice icon (ike) to represent Marcus Faust.

Faust is basically a vampire God, or almost. He’s stupidly overly powerful, has dozens of spells (some I haven’t even thought of yet) and has lived for a couple thousand years (depends on if Faust is being written in AU Earth or my own version of Nosgoth called Noristrad depends on his age). He’s telekinetic, telepathic, can teleport at will (in his youth he had wings and could fly) is arrogant and narcissistic. What I enjoy about Faust the most is though he’s this all powerful not to be trifled with vampire, he’s often torn between his role as Champion of the Vampire God (in Noristrad the actual gods are feuding and each have a champion) and as someone who doesn’t want the way things are to change. When Faust was younger he saw what happened when vampires took over the land, it was devastating and starvation nearly wiped out the humans and vampires. (Think AD&D version of the movie Daybreakers.)
His stories usually always start out with Isadora (the vampire God) in the guise of Jacqueline Amore (she cheats on the hands off rule) asking him to do something. Faust doesn’t like to do things alone, goes and finds his cousin Dante Seraphim and together they have an adventure. (I was trying to write a Sam & Dean Winchester relationship before Supernatural, but they did way better than me.) Faust first appeared in my writings in 2000, shortly after playing Soul Reaver for the first time. Now the funny thing is that even though I say now that Marcus Faust is my favorite character, it was originally Dante Seraphim or rather Raziel that was my favorite. I was in love with Raziel’s voice. However as the years went by and I played more Soul Reaver and Blood Omen, my favoritism changed and in 2013 I was writing Faust stories without Dante in them.
If you care to check them out, I’ve posted my last Faust story on my blog: Dusty Words

Dreams & Creativity

My husband got a new car yesterday. It is a 2012 Hyundai Genesis, 84,000 miles. It is luxurious, but it also seems like a base model. It is the old body style, they changed it in 2013 I think.
Michael Weatherly as Logan “Eyes Only” Cale
NaNoWriMo is coming up and though I thought I was going to start with No Man’s Sky fan fiction, I might be going back to writing about vampires. I was watching Dark Angel yesterday, sort of had a Michael Weatherly day, I’d been watching NCIS, trying to catch up to the new season (I’m on Season 10) and got the urge to watch Dark Angel. Even though Michael Weatherly is second billed in the cast and eventually Max’s love interest, he plays a surprisingly small role in the first several episodes. I watched Season 1 of Dark Angel when it first came out in 2000 but I missed all of season 2. I watched it for Michael Weatherly’s character. I had a crush on him. I actually used his image for a character I had in a VtM RP (Vampire the Masquerade Role Play) I just can’t remember the chat room or the parent site. I even tried to google information about RP rooms in the 2000’s.
My character was Clifford Anezka. He was a vampire accountant. He kept the books, laundered money and often served as an alibi for other vampires. Anezka was basically a played NPC, but it was fun, but sadly most were interested in my other more common characters, one was an assassin, another a Justicar. Still I had a dream about vampires night before last and I got to thinking about Anezka’s character and if I should brush the dust off him. This is the only saved RP set I have and it is only a couple posts between myself (Clifford Anezka) and my friend Serena (Seonaid.) Anezka-Seonaid
Now the dream I had was vampires take over a post-apocalyptic world and rule it, but because they’re no longer hiding in the shadows, they’re creating too many other vampires and the new vampires are basically no more than feral dogs fighting over the scraps of humanity. However some older vampires not exactly wanting things the way they were before, but recognize that too many vampires = less food to go around. I figured I’d dust off my favorite vampires, Marcus Faust & Dante Seraphim, and bring out Darion and write about this for NaNoWriMo. Just dunno if I can make it a 50,000 word novel.
Now for work blurb. I’m going on vacation in 5 shifts. I need a break from work because I’m starting to get burned out. I’m starting to want to call in (I haven’t yet) but I’m not wanting to go to work. I want to stay home and binge NCIS, Dark Angel, play video games, and read books and write stories. Or actually I’d love to RP vampires. The only RP I do lately is the barbarians with Isa. So taking the 6 day break from work I hope will rejuvenate my desire to continue working instead of what feels like dragging myself in everyday. Also my 5-2 shift makes my days feel wasted, like I’ve not much time between getting up and going to work to get anything done.

No Man’s Sky Lost Its Shiny?

The last two days I’ve finally gotten time to play No Man’s Sky. A game that I loved and adored when it first came out and like Fallout 4 and XCOM 2 I spent my time away from the game, thinking about what I’d do in the game next. Since I discovered you can sprint even if for a limited time, it actually made the game better for me for a short while. In my last No Man’s Sky post that was the main complaint I had about the game.

Still, even with sprinting, it takes too long to travel anywhere. Also I need and easy way to be able to go back to places I’ve already discovered on planet. Take this example: I found a trading post on a planet I was mining neutrals on to sell. I’d fly out, mine Gold or Emeril or Aluminum, fly back and sell on the trading post, without having to leave the planet to go to the Space Station. However because places you previously discovered disappear from your HUD as soon as you discover them, when I flew out too far I got lost and couldn’t find the trading post again.

Because No Man’s Sky is played in real time, the easiest way I can think of is to implement an auto-pilot feature that allows the ship to travel (fastest route possible) back to a place you’ve already discovered. I just mean on planet. So I go out and mine ores, set the ship to autopilot back to the trading post, and I get up and get a drink and make a sandwich while the ship is flying.

Now here is the other weird thing about what No Man’s Sky does to me. After playing a couple hours I get overwhelmed by the urge to read or write science fiction. For NaNoWriMo I’m already going to write No Man’s Sky fan fiction (the way I write it will start as fan fiction and morph into something else.)

I’m doggedly staying with the game, but the worlds are starting to get boring and repetitive. I have yet to find all the species on one planet. I spent 2 days looking on a water world. I think my goal is to just discover star systems, planets, and move on towards the center. I’m curious as to what happens when you reach the center.

Workplace Trolls & Other Stuff

I missed a day of work from my fast food job when I was trying to transition from fast food to c-store, and apparently I missed more of Shariah (voicebox ripper girl) picking on Mason (my hero.) When he came into work last night he asked her, “So what adjunct am I today?” I was not part of the conversation.

“What?” She asked.
“What adjunct am I today? First I was white, then gay, so what am I today?” Apparently Shariah called him gay the day I missed work. Shariah didn’t answer him. She did however spend the shift going on about how she hates fat people. Shariah is 5’2″ and probably weighs a 100 lbs. She didn’t get fat people, she doesn’t know how people allow themselves to get that fat. I wanted to tell her that some people have medical issues (such as thyroid problems) and that is a reason for their obesity. Or it is genetic (where the body lacks the signal of feeling full), or even self medicating (eating makes us happy, that is why we eat). I eventually got tired of listening to her (I’m overweight and I know exactly why) and said, “Because I love food and I hate to exercise.”
While in the middle of writing this I actually paused and tried to figure out what word best describes Shariah. She says negative things to elicit a response, such as walking around saying she hates white people or fat people, and it took me a bit to realize she’s a troll. I honestly usually don’t come across trolls outside of the internet anymore.
I found this article: Dealing With Workplace Trolls
Now for the other stuff. So in April I borrowed $1900 from my grandfather to treat the bedbugs in the house. I’ve been paying him back every month either $100 or $200, I currently still owe him $1300. Apparently my daughter told my family about our car problems, like we spent $650 on a Ford Explorer that required almost $600 with the work (we got have of that done for free) and now it is on its last legs (wheels?). It has started taking longer to crank to get it to start, and it knocks after it has been running for awhile. Then my husband’s Chrysler is running rough, engine also knocks. So my grandfather calls me and says I don’t have to pay back the loan, to use that money to buy a new car. My best friend says that is a great, but I’m feeling that way. We just bought a new car, that Ford Explorer (well new to us.) Then there is the paying back the money part. When my husband and I borrow money, we pay it back. We’ve never defaulted on a loan. I asked my husband how long have we lived in our house, 4 years, he says. “How many times have we been late on the mortgage in 4 years?”
Never.”
I have issues with my brother. Yes, he came through, he replaced the fuel pump and a ball joint in the Explorer, but there is just so much he needs to make up for, and then there are somethings he can’t make up for, he won’t even admit to it. However one thing my brother does not do it pay back money. He borrowed $1000 from me and never paid it back. My grandfather says that Rob borrows money all the time and is real bad about paying him back and this was my chance to prove that I am better at something than my brother. (I’m actually a lot better than my brother at a lot of things, I’m better at being kind, better looking, I can crochet better, write better, teach better, better at being creative…) However this was my chance to prove to my family that I was better than my brother at something. My brother is the golden boy of the family, and I’m like some sort of afterthought like, “Oh that’s right, he has a sister, we should invite her to the family functions too.” (It isn’t really like that, but that is how I feel.)
Let’s talk how estranged I am from my family. I see most of them only on Thanksgiving & Christmas, and I want to point out that all of them live with in 40 minutes or less of me. My brother sees them all the time. He goes hunting or fishing or farting around at the ‘farm.’ My grandfather has 80 acres in Ste Genevieve. I have never been there and don’t even know where it is located exactly. I only know it is in Ste Genevieve. I’ve never been invited to go to the farm. Or for my grandfather’s birthday the family gets together every year at their favorite restaurant called Crusoe’s. I’ve only ever gone twice and only ever been invited four times, not since I’ve been married, I mean ever.